McLaren MP4-12C: How I ended up climbing up the front of the Squamish Chief

Many times in my life, the course of my journey was altered by a phone call. And so it happened that a phone call on a beautiful summer day changed my life for the better and forever. In 1986, my relationship with my long term girlfriend had imploded ( it's a funny story now , I'll tell you later ) I had sold my auto towing business and was looking for something new and wonderful to do.

A friend of mine phoned up and asked if I was interested in going rock climbing in Squamish. Now this is 1986, and all that I know about rock climbing, I learned from watching the "Eiger Sanction " on the TV movie of the week. And based on that knowledge it didn't look like such a shit hot thing to do. This particular buddy had tried to coax me out several times before, but I thought it was a little too nutty and extreme for even a guy like me. This day was different, I was ready for something new and I desperately craved for a new direction in life.
In those days, rock climbing as a full on sport was still in it's infancy, and was primarily the domain of straggly hardmen ( and women ) who risked life and limb to scale vertical rock walls hundreds or thousands of feet above the deck. At the time it was a very non-mainstream activity, and generally the mention of it generated rolling eyeballs and the universal crazy finger around the ear move.

My friend sold me on the idea, and on a fantastic July day, we ventured out for "day one" of the rest of my climbing days. From the Sunshine Coast, you need to catch a ferry to Horseshoe Bay, and then zoom up the Squamish Highway for 45 or so minutes to get to the climbing areas. I had no clue, but the place was littered with places to climb, some obvious others hidden. All of it brand new to and pregnant with possibility. We started with basic lessons and moves at Murrin Park, doing laps up and down "Sugarloaf" ( all the climbs are named and rated on the Yosemite system for difficulty ) I was in my runners, sliding and slipping all over the place. I was so nerved out by all the new stuff, like trusting the harness and rope to catch me, and placing my feet on impossible little features, that my fingers were bleeding from holding on too tight. My friend was a phenomenal and patient teacher and guide. He was very tolerant of the rookie show that I was putting on. Keep in mind that I have been in the gym power-lifting for a while now, and do not have the greatest body for defying gravity. As I would learn, it's way better to be lighter when climbing than stronger, the physics of the whole thing just works better that way. Regardless, as we moved to different sites and I grew somewhat accustomed to life off the ground, I knew that I was totally and completely sold in this new sport.
The first multi-pitch climb that we ventured up was called "Banana Peel", for me it was the biggest, hairiest undertaking ever. As it turns out, it's really a cake walk and excellent low-timer route. But on my first Squamish climbing weekend, in my runners and old track pants, it was epic.

First weekend in Squamish , runners, track pants and a Whillans harness on "Stairway" Murrin Park

Lets pause here for a breather and to discuss some of the terms used in climbing.

In those days, ropes came in one length, 50 meters/165 ft. The ropes are fairly durable and have a certain amount of stretch built into them. One rope length can be considered a "pitch" It could be less, it could be more......but for here and now, let's agree that it's "generally" 50 meters or so . Multi-pitch climbs are then multi-rope length ascents.
In those seemingly pre-historic days there were only about two different brands of specialized sticky and stiff climbing shoes, EB's and Scarpa as far as I know. These shoes help a climber to cling on to impossible little nubs of rock while ascending and in return they supply you with mind-numbing foot cramping pain.. Today there are more brands and specialized types than there are burgers at McDonalds.
Powdered chalk is used on the hands to absorb the sweat and oil, so that gripping the tiny features is more positive and less prone to slip off.
Various types of simple or fancy gear is used for securing the climbers to the rock and supplying a margin of safety. The pitons of old are rarely used, instead easy to install and remove chocks or spring loaded cam devices provide fall protection. (shortened to the term "pro".....as in putting in a piece of pro )
I'll let you do the research on the Yosemite rating system, but once you become a climber, I assure you, it will be an essential way to describe your new world.

A whole new way of being opened up for me on that first weekend, a completely different and wonderful way of looking at things. My one and only regret is that I didn't get into it sooner.

Leading "Local Boys" a smooth and steep climb to the right of Shannon Falls, one of the very best days of my life was climbing this route with my teenage son and daughter a couple years ago

Climbing pal, Ivo, on Klahanie Crack

Upon returning to the mundane world of sidewalks and sea level, I went about the business of gathering climbing equipment for future trips to the land of the vertical. I returned many times to hone my skills and learn new techniques and try new routes. Some years were better than others, depending on work, weather and the availability of partners. In the years when I logged the most hours, I got in some of my boldest climbs. Some of the biggest challenges came from my size and weight, at a thick and chunky 200 to 220 pounds, compared to my fellow marathon runner-like climbers at 160 to 175, overcoming gravity was a struggle. Nonetheless, I managed to lead climbs like "Teetering on the Brink of Madness" ( love the names! ), "Local Boys", "Snake", "Snakes and Ladders", the "Buttress", and many other climbs that provided exhilaration and raw fun.

A ledge to rest on during the ascent of "Snake"

On the way up to "Teetering on the Brink of Madness".....the result of taking a leader fall off the crux of "Teetering" is a smashed body and world class pain ... best to avoid doing that

on the way up to knock off "Mercy Me" heading towards "the Split Pillar"

At the top of a super fun and funky climb called "Garfield"

2006, twenty years later...just damned happy to be in Squamish. This at the "Smoke Bluffs" area...any day that has chalk on your hands is a good day

If you decide to take up climbing...get trained by a passionate expert who cares about your safety...now and in the future above all. Period. And , make sure that you go climbing with people who are better than yourself, and again....put safety first. Plus...as you can see in these old photos, I never wore a helmet back then. If you go climbing at any level....wear a fucking helmet to protect your noggin and to keep from being dead. I'm sorry, that was harsh and uncalled for...let me re-phrase that. Wear a fucking helmet to protect your noggin and to keep from being dead. There that's much better.