Home room with Mrs.Hircus.
The girl who sat across from me, was a bit of a pal from the Sechelt Elementary days. Apparently her summer was a tad more advanced than mine. As the home room buzz was going on, she leaned over and quietly said,
" Do you want to come over to my place this weekend?"
" I guess,.... what do you want to do?"
Big smile, she offered up with, "Well, I thought we could fool around "
"Hmm, fool around doing what?"
...I'm thinking tree forts, bike riding and skipping rocks...maybe shoot cans with a pellet gun.
"You know, just fool around, ...me and you"
" I'm gonna need more details if I'm gonna come up to Sechelt"
...Wanting some sort of hint as to whether this was going to be more interesting than a Davis Bay weekend.
Persistent and still all smiley...she ended with,
"Just come over on the weekend, and I'll make it worth your while."
Dumb-ass...
I never went.
Some other country bumpkin activity must have gotten my attention.
We never did hook up...home room girl and me....
Although she did manage to stick her tongue an amazing distance down my throat in a coat room attack one day.
I hung around with older guys in grade 8.
Dayton boots, steel toed boots, dirty jeans and Mac jacket kinda crowd. Likely to have a 9/16 wrench in the back pocket. Not real big on academics ...or even hand washing for that matter.
One Monday, before home room.....
the talk was about the weekend adventures...
one guy asks the other
"Did you fuck her?"...
.I had no clue what "fuck her" meant...I listened in.
The talk continued.
A certain amount of bragging and posturing developed.
Some Cheshire Cat grinning.
None of this brought any new clarity
....none. Special kissing?...some sort of custom titty grab?...
it seemed like pretty important stuff....no way in the world I was going to ask this bunch of thugs to explain...
No way. No how.
What...ask and look stupid...uninformed?...with this pack of hyenas...???
What...ask and look stupid...uninformed?...with this pack of hyenas...???
When I was around 12 yrs old or so....On a summer day on Davis Bay beach...one of the older boys, a summer only resident, explained why he had a condom in his wallet. It was a pretty fair explanation... all things considered.
We listened with great interest, until it was plainly clear to us..... that he thought we were just a couple of country dupes, who would believe anything.
We were on to him, like syrup on pancakes.
We didn't believe a bit of it..none!
He was totally bullshitting us.
We laughed our heads off.
When your penis does ...what???
Your going to put what ...where?...
Why on earth would you want to do that??
a "boner" ...what the hell are you talking about?
your girlfriend is going to let you do that?...with a rubber balloon on it?
get real man!...pull the other one!
We thought that because he was a city boy, he could tell a whopper and get us country boy shmucks to believe him.
We laughed for days about his explanation.
Calling each other "Boner"..... as we walked to the corner store to buy Mojos....two for a penny.
Bragging that we weren't stupid enough to get sucked in by this far-fetched story...
A friend of mine just commented on the Dr. Strangelove movie clip....saying that they watched the movie in the school gym as young teenagers. When Major Kong ( Slim Pickens ) read out the emergency supplies list and came to "prophylactics"....they all scratched their heads and assumed them to be " propeller elastics "
John Lennon "Nobody Told Me"....( there'd be days like these )
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