I got to thinking more about the process of story telling. I was raised on stories and tales of work experiences, family history, and various adventures...with some wins and some losses. Some of these wins and losses were indeed financial, but most were in reputation or status within the community.
I lived most of my life in a small rural community that absolutely thrives on gossip and the coffee shop "news feed ". I really didn't notice it that much until I moved away. When I went across the pond to the city for other work options, the level of gossip that was acceptable there was much less. After being away for a bit, and then returning to visit friends and kids, the difference in social behavior was like night and day.
When I left the Sunshine Coast to work on the highway project, there were very few people who knew the "why and wherefore" of how it all came about. So the gossip train started up ...full steam ahead. Stories of all stripes and colors blew across the small contractor community, trying to fill in the gaps of knowledge. Old friends and acquaintances struggled to keep up with the latest and greatest news. Rarely did anyone phone up and ask, "What are you doing, and why are you doing it?" On visits back to the coast, or maybe on the ferry, people would ask a few questions and then try to filter it through the gossip that they had absorbed on streets, in coffee shops or on pick-up truck tailgates.
As more time went by, I noticed a fascinating trend. When I met old friends, or talked to them on the phone...they would tell ME....how I was doing. Stories and supposed facts and numbers would roll out as I listened incredulously to my life work being trotted out for review. I sat through most of a ferry ride one day as a "Coaster" relayed all the news and gossip about what I had been up to. I couldn't get a word in edgewise to make corrections and it looked very much like my "biographer" wasn't really interested in my version anyways. The great part about some of these particular tales is that they were actually better than the truth! I listened as the numbers, dollars and circumstances all inflated way past what I would have attempted to pull off in conversation. So I decided to just let it go and become the "truth".
The Truth
As time goes by in my life, the search for Truth, gets fuzzier by the minute. In the early days of the highway project, we as workers were subject to scrutiny from the various news agencies that were covering the controversial project. The protesters brought the first waves of news-trucks, reporters and camera equipped helicopters. We watched as the protesters told their story to the media, and then the government and contractor media relations people would have their go at it. The story that ended up on the evening news, looked nothing like the the actual events of the day. So, unless you were there, at the scene...with some decent background information...accepting the evening news as "truth" was definitely going to lead you astray.
We also learned a few coping techniques ourselves as targets of the media glare. It became common knowledge that someone in the media had access to our radio and maybe even cellphone conversations. We would have some sort of mishap on-site, calls were made internally to deal with it.... and within minutes a news helicopter would be circling overhead. We found that it was taking about ten or fifteen minutes for the helicopter to arrive. So a new strategy needed to be rolled out. Unofficially, the deal was...when the inevitable event occurs...you have ten to fifteen minutes to get things on the ground organized before the eye in the sky gets there. For longer lasting events, where actual on the ground news reporters would show up, the company had a very strong "no talk" policy. Unapproved chit-chat with a reporter, equaled...unemployment.
And eerily similar to "gossip", the actual news broadcast or newspaper article was unfocused, biased and sometimes missed the whole freakin' point.
Gossip versus Bullets
How many people do you know, that actively sift through the information that is presented to them, in order to ascertain the truth?...any?
This is what makes gossip, slanderous talk and character assassination such an effective tool for bullies and nasty people with nasty agendas. A person who tells lies and misrepresentations, or who makes false accusations with the proper amount of drama and energy will tend to be believed. Even if the story is a complete fabrication, total horse-shit....a little nugget, a kernel of the lie, sticks in our heads. It seems to be human nature. There is very little defense against such an attack and the true verbal bully will know this.
It has been said by researchers that it takes four times as much energy to undo a lie, as it does to tell it
I would question these numbers based on my own experiences. I would put it somewhere between ten to one....and totally fucking impossible....Hence the "shit sticking to a wool blanket" analogy. Look at how many falsely accused people can't get rid of the "stink" of the lies told about them.
Gossip and character assassination is the perfect crime. No gunpowder residue, no blood, no obvious weapon. But....there is a victim. A victim with invisible wounds, that may or may not heal.
Why would someone stoop to this level of existence?
1. Well obviously it's cheap and effective...and in the modern age we live in ...isn't that enough?
2. It can be a form of "payback" for some offended party to lash out to cause pain and embarrassment
3. It is usually some sort of power play with in a social structure, community or group.
4. It is often used as a smoke screen to hide the actions of the "gossiper" To quote from a professional media person..."In politics and business, if your house is on fire ....it's not so important that you put it out.....as it is to go and light a bigger and more dramatic fire at your opponents house"
5. It's a very strong human trait to try to make others appear small, so that you can feel bigger. Tearing down another person is easy, quick and makes insecure people feel wonderful.
Spreading lies, misinformation, rumors and half truths in a society that condones such activity becomes a social disease. False accusations are so easy to spread and so very hard to defend against. It's no wonder that the gossipers and false accusers feel so powerful and righteous. The chances of being caught out are slim to none....however the overall social "tone" of a community is less, for accepting this kind of behavior.
Gossip at it's simplest form is a method of social communication. It can bring knowledge and connection to people and groups. In it's lowest form it is used as a social weapon, that is invisible and damaging to the same people and groups.
It's extremely difficult to filter out all that we hear, see and read these days. Governments and business depend on that fact. If we don't question what we hear and see, then the presented message becomes the "Truth". Even complete and total fabrications can become "Truth" if repeated often enough with the proper amount of zeal and tone.
Total and complete truth ( accurate information ) is a squishy and hard to pin down beast. The billions of people on our planet all own billions of "truths". The best place to start..... is to root out the complete fabrications, lies and fabrications from the rest of the static and move on from there.
.....oh, and there's always the Karmic debt build-up of nastiness....but you have to very patient and trusting to let that one take care of things.
Story telling...somewhere between fun and downright fucking dangerous.
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